Day 3 of Blog posts. This is haaarrrdddd.

Wahhhh. Writing every day is hard. That's why I don't usually do it, and consequently have not written the greatest novel of the past century yet. I'm lazy. It's true. Ok, today's update. I worked on the farm in the pouring fracking driving rain for a few hours. Then the misery got the best of everyone and I came home, took a blazing hot shower, put on my pj's and went to bed - at 2 o'clock. Yeah, I have a lot to whine about. I did get up at 5 and go pick up Mags from my 'rents so I wasn't in bed all day. Just half of it. It was rad.

I did finish a book today: A Brief History of Nearly Everything by Bill Bryson - Audio. This book scared the bejesus out of me. You should give it a listen. I hate science but this was really interesting, even if it did contain the names of nearly everyone who had ever discovered anything of consequence during the past ohhh 300 years or so, it was still really good. It scared the crap out of me because apparently at any time, we could be completely be wiped out by an asteroid, and nearly have been on many occasions, and if that isn't scary enough we are due to have the poles shift places (north becomes south etc.) AND for a giant super volcano under Yellowstone to blow up. Great. Maybe I should spend less time napping and more time doing exciting things. You know, before I blow up. Although in the great scheme of things I guess it doesn't matter.

I started another book, but can't remember the name of it right now. It's suspsense/mystery by some British dude. It's good so far but I'm only 50 or so pages in.

I'm going to post some pictures of my driveway now, directly from Picasa - which I think will bing them to new entries, but I'm not sure. Anyway - here goes nothing.

Enjoy!

Blargh

Not a whole lot I care to post on today, due to the fact my mood had been generally annoyed bordering on completely enraged pretty much all day. Here's the dealio: it's raining. Again. Have you been to/read about/talked to someone who lives in Maine this summer? It has sucked. Here's some perspective. Today is July 7. On June 30th, the National weather service posted an announcement that said out of the past 22 days in June there had been 0 minutes of measurable sunshine. That's right ZERO. Zip. Nada. None. Not even a hint of sun peaking through the clouds for a few minutes. This statistic doesn't count the days that turned out mildly meh and then turned incredibly shitty. The weather has killed my garden, made the mosquito and slug population explode and generally sucked my sport dry for the past month. Since they posted that little announcement there have been at least 3 days that have been entirely devoid of sun.

To add insult to injury we had had whopping freaking rain storm last week which washed my driveway completely out. Remember last winter when I was bitching about how much I hated my driveway because of the plowing situation, but the summer would come and make me feel better? Well the universe decided to smack me in the face yet again. We now have to park at the bottom of our driveway and walk up. Wahhhh. Have you seen my driveway? It's really really long. About 1/8 of a mile. Also, I have a kid and tons of stuff to carry. It's going to cost a ton of dough to fix. We don't have a ton of dough to fix it, so we will be hiking up it for quite some time. Hopefully we get it taken care of before winter, because that would be a level of shit I don't think I could get deal with. I have some pictures that I can post later.

I had to go to a meeting for a company I freelance for which could have easily been taken care of over the phone. Not only that, they called me at 9am and basically told me they HAD to meet with me today. I had shit to do. I rearranged my schedule so I could go and sit there for 35 minutes. Boooo.

Then I had to go to a 4 year old's birthday party. Yeah my kid had a good time, I think. Maggie doesn't play super well with this particular girl, I don't know why. They are both great kids, they just bicker and fight constantly. Anyhow it was a long afternoon. Maggie has also been "testing her boundaries" which is a really nice parental way of saying "She won't do a goddamned thing I tell her to and argues with me constantly." It's incredibly waring. In case you were wondering the con column of my list of reasons to/not to have another kid are definitely outweighing the pros this week.

So - here's a big old poopsandwich to you. Hope you enjoyed it.

Action Pants

The list is fluid. The list is ever changing. Especially since I change my mind and reprioritize things constantly. About 4 months ago I started taking karate classes. I know! Right? Pretty crazy huh? Not on the list, but I have been devoting a significant amount of time and energy to it. Karate is something I have always wanted to learn, but just never have gotten around to it. Also, I didn't want to take classes alone, and the class I am in now was totally my friend Erin's idea. I take the class with her, my friend Tabby, Tabby's husband Kevin, and some other random people.

I love karate. I seriously love it. Also, it's seriously hard. Which is one of the reasons I love it. I am only a yellow belt, which takes about 4 months to achieve. Within each level, or belt you receive 3 stripes. You test for each stripe about every three weeks. There is a lot of memorization in karate, not only punches, kicks, and blocks but various fighting techniques which are combinations of punches kicks and blocks that you use to fight opponents based on how they attack you. You learn 12 techniques for each belt, and each time you move up you are tested on the new techniques as well as the old. When I test for my orange belt - I will have to perform all 24 techniques as well as demonstrating the aforementioned kicks, punches, and blocks, and also these things called forms. Forms are combinations of blocks combined together in a long sequence. Long story long, by the time someone gets to black belt level, they have put in years of training, and hundreds if not thousands of hours of practicing and memorization.

That's a pretty technical way of explaining karate. Truth be told, we also do a lot of beating the shit out of things. We beat the shit out of these standing up punching bag things, and we beat the shit out of each other while wearing blockers. I have come home from many classes with bloody knuckles from the punching bag. Gross? No way. So fun. This class is also making me super strong. When I first started I could barely do 10 lady-style push ups. Now I can do 6 "man style" - don't laugh pushups are fracking hard. Go try it right now. See? Hard. Ok so 6 man pushups and 44 lady push ups. Take that. I can also do a bunch of other rad things that I couldn't do before but mostly I'm proud of the pushups.

Why else do I love it? Because I want to feel safe. I want to be able to know that if someone messes with me, ever, I will always have the upper hand. Guess who else will be taking karate soon? Maggie. I think that all girls should have to take mandatory karate from age 8 until they are black belts. How many assaults on women would occur they were all trained in karate from the 4th grade? I bet significantly fewer than there are now.

Karate - not on the 30 list, but definitely one of the things on my life list. It rocks. Oh also, because I'm taking karate doesn't mean you should come up to me and punch me on the arm. Seriously, why do people do that? Oh you're taking karate? Punch. That's just stupid. Knock it off.

I'm out.

30 in 30

After abandoning this blog for quite some time, I am going to write 30 posts in 30 days. Why? Because my friend Joe is also doing this. Also, I like the whole do something for 30 days thing. Remember when I wrote a novel in 30 days? Yeah. That was awesome.

So. Here's the news, progress, etc.

Knitting - has been a bit meh, though I did whip up a sweet sweater for my friend Alice's new baby. Knitting is hard to do in the summer, when you are lazy and hot. But if I was industrious I would be working on my X-mas gifts right now instead of waiting until Dec. 15 to start 4 pairs of mittens, 3 hats, and 2 pair of socks - which is precisely what I did last year. Did I learn my lesson? Time will tell, but I am doubtful.

Books - I have read a number of fantastic books as of late. Ok, so when I last wrote a blog I had just finished The Watchmen. Since then I have read or listened to:

American Gods - Neil Gaiman. Fantastic. Basically a bunch of gods from ye olden times live in America and are fighting a war with new gods, such as TV, Internet etc. That description sounds lame, but trust me, it's good.

Waiter Rant: Thanks for the Tip-Confessions of a Cynical Waiter Steve Dublanica - Audio. Poop Sandwich. I almost didn't finish this one. I thought it was going to be stories/essays from a waiter in the trenches. But instead this blog turned memoir really ended up just being some dude's story of how he went from waiter to writer. And honestly I couldn't have cared less. Don't bother. It's suckiness was highlighted because I had just finished -

The Making of a Chef: Mastering Heat at the Culinary Institute- Michael Ruhlman. Which is fan-freaking-tastic. Ruhlman (who I learned about because of his bud status with Anthony Bourdain) spends a year at the CIA. No, not that CIA -the other one - the Culinary Institute of America where he - yup you guessed it, trains to be a chef. This book could have been totally boring, but it wasn't. If you are interested at all in chefs, cooking, etc. Read this book.

The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo - Audio - Steig Larrson. Holy crap this was good. Good and suspenseful and surprising. I read a lot of mysteries, suspense etc. It is hard to pull one over on me or get me to be actually surprised. This one did the trick. It has a totally atypical heroine, takes place in Sweden, and is about finding a murdered girl forty or so years after the fact. That is basically all I can tell you without giving it away. Give it a try. The audio version was great. I also was happy to learn that this is part of a trilogy, the second one - The Girl Who Played with Fire - will be out on July 28. Huzzah!

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime. Mark Haddon Ok, I loved this one too. This was a great read, and super fast. Told through the eyes of an autistic 14 year old boy, I was a bit reluctant to read it at first, but am super glad I did. Christopher tries to solve the mystery of his neighbor's murdered dog, and ends up uncovering layers of unpleasantness that any person would have a hard time dealing with, but his autism makes it even harder. Super. Read it.

Fight Club - Chuck Palahniuck. Still haven't seen the movie. I loved this book. Another super short read. It was quite disturbing but well worth my time. It's about a dude who creates a bunch of fight clubs and also causes tons of trouble all over Seattle. It has a great twist and is well written. You should read this even if you have seen the movie.

I think that's it. I'm almost finished with The Brief History of Everything, which is totally freaking me out, but I'll blog about it when I'm finished. This puts me at 15 books, or half way though my goal for the year, which is about right. I have started listening to audio books when I take walks in the morning, so I have been rolling through them pretty quickly.

I'm outta here. Cya tomorrow.

Fire and Lubrication.

Nice title eh? That's what's called a hook. Anyhow, I just wanted to share an analogy I came up with this weekend after a couple of beers, and after mulling it over in a sober brain for a few days, still feel it's one of the best I've come up with in quite some time.

First a little background. In case you don't know me, my life situation is this: I am a stay at home mom. Sure I do some piece work writing from time to time, and consider myself a writer, but I make just barely enough to pay for yarn and karate class. My husband is the one who brings home the bacon. (Although, in literal terms I am the one who brings home actual bacon as I work at a farm in the summer in exchange for a veggie and pork share). This husband of mine works super hard at a job he likes fairly well. Now, this whole stay at home mom thing is a pretty sweet deal. I get to watch my kid all day - even though at times she's super super annoying and it's really hard to not just stick her in daycare and run off to something, anything that won't make me want to rip my hair out - and for the most part we do cool stuff, like go to the library, beach, play dates, walks, other cool stuff. I also do some stuff that is kinda sucky, like clean, and go grocery shopping. I tell you this because it is important to note that being a stay at home mom is neither always sucky or always awesome. In too many articles I've read it leans way far over one way or the other.

For quite some time, due to my own predilection to analyzing everything I do, and the ongoing "mommy wars" (In case you don't know there's a war waging over who is right - stay at homers or worker moms. I think they both are. Anyway if you want to know more about it google it. It can get pretty damn nasty.) I sometimes feel like my role is not as important as Mike's. Not because of anything he has said or done, but lets face it, if he didn't have the job he does we would be screwed. It pays the bills, keeps us fed, he is in essence the provider for us. How does taking care of Mags and vacuuming compare to keeping a roof over our heads?

This is where the sweet analogy came in. I love it. It makes me super happy and feel peaceful about my job. Without further adieu here it is: Our family unit is an engine. Mike provides the fuel to keep it going, and I provide the oil to make sure everything runs smoothly. Since an engine can't run without either, both are equal in importance. If we run out of gas we are dead on the side of the road, no oil and the engine seizes.

How perfect is this analogy? I'm totally gloating about it. I love it. It was, as Oprah would say, an AHA! moment for me. Anyhow, I would love to hear what y'all think of it. I could probably write more on this topic but I have things to do. And really, I just wanted to get the idea down and out there.

Peace out, my people.

Who's Watching Me?

Have you read the Watchmen? No? It's pretty good. I recommend you do so. Yes, it's a graphic novel, yes I'm over 30. Who cares? I give it a Woot! The Watchmen, if you don't know, is about a bunch of former super heroes who reunite (sort of) to find out who is killing former masked heroes (sort of). But it is also a cautionary moralistic tale, about sacrificing your morals for a greater good. I think what I just wrote there is probably one of the biggest cliches ever when it comes to reviews, but it really is. Can I get a what what from you other Watchmen readers? This will be my 8th book of the year, since I forgot to include The Wordy Shipmates by Sarah Vowell in my last blog. I listened to the audio version, and really liked it. Our forefathers were a bunch of religious nuts. I mean really. It's good to listen to stuff like that once in awhile and remind yourself from whence we came. There was a lot of banishment and eye for an eye behaviour. It also gets a Woot!

In other news, I have signed up for the Script Frenzy which starts on April 1. I recommend you do too. After lurking around on their message boards, I learned that most folks use Celtx for their script writing software, and that it's free! I downloaded a copy post haste. Let me know if you sign up. We can be writing buddies. I probably won't let you see mine though. I'm like that.

I have been doing a bit of reading about blogs that get the most views, and are "successful". In case you were wondering, this one isn't. I can tell you why too. 1. Don't update often enough. 2. Isn't organized. 3. Not enough pictures. I am toying with the idea of putting my blog on a schedule, i.e. Monday: Books Tues: Knitting Weds. 5k Training (Ha! We'll see). You get the drift. I also need to address the photo situation pronto.

In other other news, I am pretty sure I'm going to fire the Klog back up. The Klog was my old blog where I complained about news. The format will be a bit revised, AND I'm going to add a fun new feature. If I actually do it, y'all will be the first to know.

I almost forgot, I watched The Comedians of Comedy the other night. What a disappointment. I was hoping it would be either funny, or informative, or both. Alas, it was neither. If you want to see a good documentary about being a comedian, watch The Comedian - by Jerry Seinfeld. Much better. Comedians of Comedy = Poop Sandwich.

That's all for now. I think I might even get around to updating my graphs today! I'm still looking for some cooler ones though.

....And We're Back!

Hello, hello! Are you wondering where I've been for two fracking months? Well we lost our Internet. I really won't go into it too much, but basically Hughesnet is a company comprised of a bunch of lying, incompetent jerks with the worst customer service I have ever experienced. For future reference, the only way to get them to actually fix your problem is to send them an e-mail threatening to report them to the Better Business Bureau via the Attorney General's office. Worked like a charm.

So, haven't been blogging but I have been completing tasks. Since I don't want this to be a zillion pages long, and I'm sure you don't either, let me break it down for you:

Books:

1. My Heart Belongs to You - Dean Koontz - Meh.
2. Free Range Knitter - Stephanie Pearl McPhee - Woot!
3. Fray - Joss Whedon - Double Woot! (Yes I know it's a graphic novel. Don't judge me.)
4. Case Histories - Kate Atkinson - Double Woot!
5. One Good Turn - Kate Atkinson - Double Woot!

I started Dear American Airlines which according to reviews, critics, etc. I'm supposed to love. Let me tell you right now - snooze fest. I'm sick of reading book comprised of nothing but people whining and ranting. If I want to read whining and ranting I can simply read my own blog. Thank you very much. I am currently reading The Watchmen. I am sort of on a graphic novel kick. Oh and by the way, can someone explain to me the difference between a comic book and a graphic novel? No one seems to be able to. Mike says "pride". I tend to agree.

Knitting:

1. Versatility (Scarf/Shawl Thing)
2. Shalom (Cardigan)
3. Maine Morning Mitts - (Fingerless Gloves) Me
4. Maine Morning Mitts - Maggie
5. Maine Morning Mitts - Tabby
6. 3 Hour Sweater - Total Fail - Fits Maggie.

I am slowly finishing a pair of socks I started for my mom's birthday. On January 7th. I have a bad case of second sock syndrome. This is a condition in which a knitter starts a project, usually a pair of something, whizzes through the first item and then takes forever on the second. This often happens with sleeves as well. Sorry mom!

Movies:
Um, we got TV back so it's been Lost and BSG o'clock. Lost is kind of meh this season. But BSG - holy frack is it good! If you don't watch it you should. I mean it. Start with the mini-series though.

Grandmother:

4 visits. Her alzheimers is strange. Good one day, the other day, no clue. One weird thing I've noticed is that her Alzheimers seems to be spawning some sort of weird OCD, and also making her more religious. Figure that out. For example, we like to eat at a local restaruant which happens to have a very pregnant hostess. Pregnant ladies in public drive my grandmother bonko. The last time we were at the restarunt she said " Well, I suppose that girl is pregnant!"
To which I replied, "Um, yeah."
"Well, she should really cover that up! I don't need to see that!" Said my grandmother.

You see, pregnant ladies mean that people are having sex! It's right there out in the open! Oh my god! But really then aren't all of our mere presences proof that somewhere at sometime someone had sex? It's true. We should probably all hide. The next time we go to the restaurant, repeat senario. Keep repeating senario until girl is no longer at the restaurant. This is the kind of thing that makes me want to freak out and either 1. Yell at my grandmother or 2. Bang my head against the table. I don't do either because I know it's not her fault that's she's bonko and I'm not a total bitch. At least it's mildly entertaining.

Have a made any progress in other areas? Hmm. I don't think so. Oh wait, I did get my car inspected and registered. Only because it's illegal not to though.

So, progress is being made. That's it for now. Peace.